Words have a lot of influence on both the sender and receiver.
Words have enormous power both for those who express them and for those who receive them. Even the smallest sentences should not be underestimated. Each syllable has the potential to inspire, help or do a lot of harm. This effect is even stronger when it comes from the couple. Know 7 phrases that can hurt.
When someone is angry they do not think clearly what they say and it can hurt your partner. This results in negative feelings. In a loving union one looks for precisely that, affection and respect.
A couple has ups and downs, therefore, it is necessary to think well before acting in a discussion with the other. Saying what you think you feel at that moment can cause serious problems and the true end of the love .
What are the phrases that can hurt?
You have probably already mentioned them, but there are expressions that you should avoid at all costs in your relationship. Look at these phrases that can hurt and maybe you did not think you could ruin your bond by emotionally hurting your partner.
- "Sorry but…". Apologizing saying 'but' does not help build trust, credibility or intimacy.
- "Oh yeah? but if you…". Turning things around against your partner can end with a conversation. This is perceived as a threat to the connection they have formed.
- "You always…". This phrase open the door for a discussion infinite and it will make your partner feel attacked .
- "You're just like ..." Pointing out the similarities between your partner and someone she does not want to be is a dangerous way to criticize.
- "I do not know why I'm with you." If you are so brave to express that, you should be so brave to leave at once.
- Screw rudeness
- "My ex would never have done this." Demanding your current partner the same as your previous relationship is an immature attitude which can have serious consequences.
Read this article: 7 ways to improve communication as a couple
Microagressions are the psychological abuse we call undercover, since it becomes of small and circumstantial verbal attacks on the part of the spouses. They are given in everyday life and they become customary, to such an extent that they begin to be part of the routine to the detriment of the self esteem .
They are abuses that leave no physical traces, they are not seen and perhaps, if we feel bad, we only discuss it with the people around us. We do not know until our relationship reaches such a level that there is no turning back.
For example, some phrases that can hurt include sarcasms such as "do not spend a single day without giving me a new clumsiness" and "let me do that, you are a disaster", which are highly damaging. Even more if you add the finishing phrase: "I tell you with sweetie "
These and many similar ones are circumstances that happen daily and are confused with lack, but they are always undermining and generating fatigue in the affected person . They are hitting it little by little.
Discover: How to overcome communication barriers
How to act?
Discussing has its art and is not synonymous with fighting. The way to speak, precisely, will greatly influence the magnitude of the conflict. Some of the values to avoid uncomfortable situations are empathy, respect, humility and generosity . These phrases can direct the discussion in a good direction:
- "You're right in what you say." This phrase is an opportunity to reach a midpoint with the couple.
- "I feel (like that) when you say that." Starting with this prayer provides an opening to confess feelings and strengthen ties of trust . In addition, it is a door for your partner to also express how he feels .
- "I'm sorry if I have bothered you. Tell me exactly what you feel and that way I can understand you better ... " Forget about assuming or guessing what your partner's feelings or emotions are. It allows the conversation to have spaces for understanding.
- "Why do not we try to support each other?" The honest approach invites the union of both parties to transform or end a discussion in a positive way . Gentle gestures and voice tones, physical contact and looks help in this kind of reconciliation.
Misunderstandings will always be part of an interpersonal relationship and of a couple in particular. To take them on the right track it is necessary to apply a successful concept for all aspects of life: communication and, of course, avoid phrases that may hurt.