Parents always try Educate your children the best they know and can.
However, they are sometimes not aware that they have certain Toxic behaviors With them that can do them much more harm than good. This is something that we will focus on today, in order to open our eyes to a reality that, many times, we fail to see.
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Toxic behavior of parents
Although we do not believe it, Good intentions alone are not enough . It is necessary that we do self-criticism and that we know how to identify all those toxic behaviors that can affect the children.
More than anything, because they can affect their self-esteem and cause them serious problems in the future.
But... Are the parents guilty of these toxic behaviors? No. Sometimes they are simply"copying"everything they saw him do to their parents , why There is no subject that teaches us to be parents .
It is something we learn from experience.
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We will then address 7 toxic behaviors with which, perhaps, you feel identified. It is important that you do not close in band and deny that you fulfill almost all. Think that the important thing is your son. Let's go there!
1. You are hypercritical
On many occasions we are unable to identify how critical we become with our children. It is good to point out mistakes, because this helps change and the child realizes where it fails.
However, we must also keep in mind that Continued criticism does not do any good . Being overly critical can cause insecurities in our children and will make them mistrust their own abilities and abilities.
2. Punish negative emotions
We often distinguish between positive and negative emotions, when Many negative emotions are really positive . Fear, for example, can save our lives on more than one occasion.
This is why we should Allow our children to express their emotions , That they cry, that they show their sadness, that if they are afraid they will manifest it... The repression will never be good because, sooner or later, all that repression will leave someplace.
3. Decide on them
Children are children, but that does not mean that they can not have a voice or a vote. It is true that there are certain decisions in which parents have to intervene, but in others it is not necessary!
Let your children make the decisions they can make , Thus you will promote its security and will not provoke the opposite.
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4. Instill fear
Children should live in a safe and secure environment. , Not in one where fear is continually stalking them. Children need to commit mistakes , Explore and start experiencing life.
If they are afraid, they will become insecure and fearful even of themselves. It is important that we do not instill this feeling, because living in fear is not living.
5. They are not to blame
Sometimes, The parents unload their frustrations with the children making them feel guilty Of things for which they are not responsible.
This can cause them a big problem tomorrow, in which the feeling of guilt will bring them already internalized. No one should make others feel guilty, let alone the parents to their children.
6. Love has no conditions
This is a serious mistake in which parents fall without realizing it. The love of the parents for the children should not have conditions , Should not depend on the achievements or behaviors that children have.
This will only cause them to feel that they do not deserve to be loved and is something they will always carry behind their backs.
7. Do not put limits
Sometimes it happens when we have several children or, simply, we do not intend to put so many limits. This is a mistake. Children need limits That will allow them to be safe from the world they are discovering.
The limits are positive , Because without them they can begin to develop negative and challenging behavior.
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If you have identified yourself as a parent with some of these toxic behaviors, or if you have seen your parents identified in them, it is important that you modify these behaviors and not repeat them again.
We are forming the People who will have to live in this world and relate . All these behaviors will not make life easier, but will make it even more difficult.
Do we start, from today, to eliminate all these behaviors Toxic ?